Heyooooo people!
Once again I’ve been hella late in posting, but THIS time, I’ve got the greatest reason EVERRRR! You see, your girl right here has been strugglin. Strugglin with kids, time, work, money and whatever else there is to struggle with! I think a better word for it is STRESS! Ahhh, Stress, you bastard! I hate you. Actually I hate you so much that I actually started to HATE ME! and so, I went to a doctor… and guess what?! I got some meds for that too.
I have actually been diagnosed as depressed. HAHA! Nooooo shit. Maybe the warning signs should have come to me a bit earlier, like the weight gain? The countless hours I would spend in bed? The fact that I was hiding from being social? Or the fact that I was flat out losing it with my kids? Ugh… I don’t know, but it was there for a while. Actually, more than a while, about 10 months, but finally boiling to a head in these last 3 months. I couldn’t take it, I’m not one to “talk” with my doctor, I only go to see him when I’m sick and virtually dying, but finally I went and let it all out. I thought it was anxiety honestly, but depression makes so much more sense.
So I started taking this crazy ass drug and holy GOOD GOD! I feel like I’m peaking on E about 40 minutes after I take it. It was horrible in the beginning. My pupils would dilate, my jaw would clench and I felt like I had to squeeze my eyes shut just to make sure the good ol’ eye balls stayed in! I was nauseous, I was passing out or lying awake at night. But here I am on the second week with it, and making sure I’m well fed, hydrated and figuring out the best time to pop seems to be the key to not having all these side effects. My spirits have been pretty good AND I can notice a very high level of tolerance in regards to the kids that was missing for quite sometime.
In addition to this, I’m on other meds to balance out my hormones since I am a PCOS sufferer. Birth control and Metformin are playing a role in getting that taken care of. I really need to get back to exercising regularly again and then all should be well! Haaay!
Down side to the anti-depressant? No puffing. ::sigh::
